March Madness.  It’s the time of year when college basketball dominates the sports landscape.  And it always gets me thinking about February 28, 1998.  The day Elton Brand turned my life around!

A year earlier, my wife and I had moved to California so I could pursue a screenwriting career in Hollywood.  But the Dream Factory was turning into a nightmare.  My writing was rejected all over town. My day job was menial and not lucrative.  And my finances were quickly dwindling.

On top of everything else, my wife was homesick for the East Coast.  No happy wife.  No happy life!

But February 28, 1998 proved to be a turning point.  It was the big Duke-North Carolina rivalry basketball game.  And, as a lifelong Duke fan, I knew first-hand the transformative and magical healing power of beating Carolina.

So my wife and I met up with a few old friends and prepared for victory.

When It Rains, It Pours!

But with 11 minutes left in the game, Duke trailed by 17 points!  The specter of the impending loss had a compounding negative impact on my psyche.

Why had I given up the security of our East Coast life? Why did I ever think I could compete in the ultimate shark tank?  Perhaps it was time to pull the plug on the on this misguided venture?

It was an unfortunate reality check and a new low point.

It’s Time To Step Up

But then Duke star Elton Brand took over the game.  He demanded the ball on each possession.  He dominated on both ends of the floor.  He put the team on his back and refused to cave in to defeat.

Miraculously, Duke erased a 17-point deficit and escaped with a thrilling come-from-behind victory.  Thank you, Elton Brand!

Just as the inevitable loss had a disproportionate negative impact, the improbable win had the opposite effect.

I quickly boomeranged back to confidence.

Of course I had what it took to succeed in this town.  Of course my wife and I could carve out a happy life.  It was time step up and take control on my destiny!

What Is the Point?

From that day forward, my wife and I embraced our California adventure and attacked our dreams with passion.

And more importantly, I learned a key lesson on the journey to resilience.  During the darkest times, it doesn’t take much to move the needle in either direction. 

A small setback can create an unreasonable level of angst and despair.  When the world seems tilted against us, the magnifying lens intensifies our negative emotions.  Even the most trivial stumbling block can validate our pessimistic mindset.

But a sudden, positive  turn of events, no matter how insignificant, can snap us right out of our jaundiced outlook.  We quickly regain perspective.  We quickly regain our focus and energy.  We quickly realize the world wants us to succeed.

Negative Thoughts Breed Negative Outcomes

It’s not easy to persevere in turbulent times.  We experience a losing streak.  Our sales hit rock bottom.  We are underappreciated and overlooked.  Our relationships fall apart.  Our sense of self-worth wanes.

Any additional setback, no matter how minor, can exacerbate our negative mindset.  If we give up and accept this as the norm, we are sure to continue our slide toward mediocrity.  If we embrace the victim attitude, our failure will be complete.

And if we approach the world as if everyone wants us to fail, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy.

Resilience is a STATE OF MIND

The reality is that we can always find excuses.  We can always feel like a victim.  We can put a negative spin on any situation.  It’s not hard.

But resilience takes guts.

Resilience requires the perseverance to power through any challenging situation.    It requires the ability to keep moving forward toward a better outcome.  It requires the patience to hold out for that positive sign of hope.  No matter how big or small.

Where Do We Go From Here?

So, did I go on to write the next great American film classic?  Did that Elton Brand moment catapult me to fame and fortune?  Of course not!  Who has ever heard of Rob Clark?!  Ha!

But the Elton Brand lesson had a far greater impact than any money or Academy Award.  That performance taught me to stay conscious of my mindset and always hold out hope for a positive outcome.  No matter how dire the situation.

If we search for reasons to give up, we are sure to find them!

But if we keep grinding and truly believe things will get better, we cannot lose!

There is no reason to give up hope despite the odds you are facing.  Despite the setbacks you have already endured.  You just need to dig deep, stay positive and focus on the future.  Your Elton Brand moment is right around the corner!

Until next week, keep smiling!