We all have dreams and goals that keep us engaged and give us hope for the future.   But what happens when we stop stretching to improve ourselves and refuse to grow?  Curt Coffman, co-author of First, Break All the Rules, outlines an interesting profile in the modern office work environment: “The C.A.V.E. Dweller” (Consistently Against Virtually Everything).  These are employees who are actively disengaged in the office and are constantly tearing down the ideas and strategies of the engaged employees.  If there is a new sales regimen, they will stick with what they know and attack the new approach.  If there is a new product launch, they will cling to the old version and refuse to acknowledge the new platform.  Cave dwellers are never encouraging their teammates to be successful and are only happy when everyone else is miserable around them.   If you want to get philosophical, I believe the real issue with the “cave dwellers” is their own fear of failure.  An office cave dweller will never take a risk for fear of exposing a weakness.  Since they are against every new policy, they never have to stretch beyond their comfort zone and, therefore, reduce their chances of public failure.  But the great irony is that by never testing their own abilities, they never grow in the job.  True they may never fail, but, eventually, they become even more disengaged as others are promoted around them.  It becomes a constant cycle of negativity and stifled growth which ultimately leads to even more dissatisfaction.

Unfortunately, this cave dweller mentality can carry over into other areas of our life as well.  A good friend of mine is now a successful screenwriter and director in Hollywood.  We were discussing some of his earlier creative works and he admitted he was thoroughly embarrassed by his first screenplays.  Upon completion, he thought they were masterpieces, but through the prism of time and experience he recognized his work was riddled with inconsistencies.  No wonder he got rejected all over town!  But without trying something new and stretching his talents to create those initial stories, he never would have gained the valuable experience he needed to master his craft.   Had he never attempted those stories and exposed himself to criticism and failure, he never would have realized his incredible potential.  In essence, his early failures made him the success he is today!  How many of us are so afraid to embarrass ourselves, that we never even make that first attempt?  We don’t raise our hand to ask a question for fear of sounding like a fool.  How will we ever learn?  We don’t strive for a promotion for fear of getting rejected.  How will we ever know how much we can influence the organization?  We don’t workout in in the gym because we are too weak to bench press as much as our peers.  How will we ever get stronger?  We don’t try out for a sports team because we are afraid of getting cut.  How will we ever know how good we can be?  We don’t launch a new business because we are afraid it will collapse around us.  How will we ever test our leadership?  The cave dweller mentality strikes down any new plan of action before it can even begin.  If you are Consistently Against Virtually Everything, your fear of failure will guide your actions.  As a result, you may never experience a crushing defeat.  You may never feel the sting of embarrassment when failing at something new.   But stifling your creativity, curiosity and passion ensures you will never reach your full potential.  And isn’t that the greatest defeat of all?

“It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.” Theodore Roosevelt

Worst of all, the cave dweller mentality inhibits our resiliency.  Our failures make us stronger.  Each time we come back after a defeat, our resiliency builds like exercising a muscle.  This breeds confidence.  Because we have proven we can overcome obstacles, we are more willing to break down walls and stretch to try new things in the future.  Soon there is nothing can keep us from achieving our goals.  If we never attempt anything new or jettison an idea before testing it out, we will avoid embarrassment and failure in the short term.  But our ability to handle adversity withers away and our resiliency atrophies from inaction.  When tragedy or defeat ultimately strikes, it can be so foreign and so overwhelming that it becomes even harder to recover.  And that is not a recipe for a happy and successful life.

So why not try something new?  Why not stretch your potential and step out of your comfort zone?  Why not embrace a new idea or strategy?  Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and risk failure and a broken heart.  It is not always going to work out for you.  And that is okay.  You will come back even stronger in the long run.  Stay resilient!  Stay positive!  You are not a cave dweller.    There is nothing that will be able to stop you.  Your greatest success is yet to come.

Until next week, keep smiling!